2023 featured political scandals, random violence, sports hopes raised and dashed
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It was a year of political scandals and random violence, of sports hopes raised and dashed, of frightening anti-Semitism and the declared end of the COVID global emergency.
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It was a year where a diabetes drug took Hollywood by storm, wildfires raged across the nation and an orange clown facing 91 felony counts — including efforts to overturn the 2020 election — is actually leading in the polls to once again be president of the United States. But at least one sane state has said Donald Trump should not be on the ballot.
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As 2023 limped to a close, let’s look back at some of the highlights and lowlights of the year that was.
HAIL TO THE HURRICANE
There won’t be another like her. Just weeks shy of her 102nd birthday, we lost a legend with the death of former Mississauga mayor Hazel McCallion, a force of nature who turned a hamlet into a city during her 36-year reign and worked tirelessly long after her retirement.
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WE THOUGHT BOY SCOUTS NEVER CHEAT
Four months after John Tory was elected to a historic third term, our straight-arrow mayor resigned in a shocking scandal — turns out the straightlaced family man had a long-running, on-and-off affair with a former underling 38 years his junior, a pandemic fling later found to have violated the city’s code of conduct. Now Tory is back on the airwaves as a municipal affairs expert.
CONSCIOUS UNCOUPLING
Being a politician is obviously tough on a married couple. In August, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced he and wife Sophie Gregoire Trudeau were separating after 18 years of marriage and she’d moved out of Rideau Cottage. Rumours soon surfaced — thanks to her paramour’s divorce proceeding — that she was already in a relationship with an Ottawa pediatric surgeon.
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WHO KNEW HE WAS A SWIFTY?
After our embarrassing prime minister joined the demand that global superstar Taylor Swift bring her megashow to Canada, Time magazine’s woman of the year sold out all six Toronto dates of her Eras Tour within minutes with resale tickets now going for as much as $95,000.
FORD’S FOLLIES
Premier Doug Ford was plagued by a mess of controversies — from opening private health care to plans to move the Ontario Science Centre. But nothing compared to the Greenbelt scandal. His flip-flop decision to open 7,400 acres of the protected Greenbelt saw a public outcry, two scathing reports and a number of resignations before the apologetic premier reversed the land swap. And now, enter the Mounties.
LET’S MAKE A DEAL
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Ford warned Torontonians that electing Olivia Chow as their new mayor would be an “unmitigated disaster.” But after she won, becoming the first woman and first racialized person elected to the post, the polar opposites had a surprising detente: She agreed to play nice on his redevelopment of Ontario Place, with its Therme spa plan, in exchange for $1.2 billion in cash going toward Toronto transit, housing and shelter support and the province’s takeover of the Gardiner Expressway and Don Valley Parkway.
ER, I WON’T DRINK TO THAT?
The year began with uproar at new health guidelines by the Canadian Centre on Substance Use and Addiction recommending we limit ourselves to just two drinks per week. What a downer, considering we’re finally allowed alcohol in city parks and Ford is making good on his promise of beer and wine in corner stores — by 2026.
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MAN THE BATTLE STATIONS
Before he was ousted by Fox News — good riddance — former blowhard Tucker Carlson wanted the U.S. to invade and “liberate” Canada.
IS IT LIVE OR IS IT MEMOREX?
OK, most of you don’t understand that reference. Look it up. The emergence of artificial intelligence has been both hailed and feared. We got a taste of its power in April when AI managed to trick music fans with “Heart on a Sleeve,” which sure sounded like a collaboration between Drake and The Weeknd that went viral before it was taken down.
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ANIMAL CRACKERS
Is it something in the water? After escaping from an overnight stay at the Oshawa zoo, a fugitive kangaroo punched an officer before finally being recaptured three days later; in northern Ontario, a woman was bitten by a one-armed baboon named Mark after he slipped away from his owner’s home. Local beekeepers were called to the rescue after five million bees were released from crates that fell off a truck in Burlington. And how did a chicken recently cross the road? He hitched a ride aboard the subway.
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LET THEM EAT CAKE
While grocers posted record profits, people had a hard time putting food on the table this year as prices rose by 5.6% during the first nine months of 2023. Loblaw chair Galen Weston was particularly roasted after photos circulated of five boneless chicken breasts priced at a whopping $37.
CONTINUED TRAGEDY OF BEING A T.O. SPORTS FAN
Blue Jays star pitcher Alek Manoah flamed out, pitcher Anthony Bass was released after his anti-LGBTQ posts, the team was sent packing after being swept by the Minnesota Twins in a wild card series and we lost out on superstar Shohei Ohtani. On the slim plus side, Vladimir Guerrero Jr. won the Home Run Derby and beloved bat-flipping Jose Bautista retired as a Blue Jay after signing a one-day contract.
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BASKETBALL SIDE OF THINGS WASN’T MUCH BETTER
The Raptors fired coach Nick Nurse after the team was eliminated from playoff contention and fan favourite Fred VanVleet left for Houston. But at least the Leafs won their first playoff series since 2004, so hope springs eternal.
S’MORES ANYONE?
It was the worst year for wildfires in Canadian history and the faraway blazes blanketed the city in an eerie orange haze and an ever-present smell of campfires.
GOING FOR GOLD
It was an audacious caper that saw someone simply walk away with $20 million in gold from an Air Canada storage facility at Pearson Airport. Cue the lawsuits and the major motion picture that you just know will get made.
THE BLOODIER WAY
Riding the Rocket continued to be a dangerous proposition as random violence plagued the TTC this year with stabbings, assaults and murder — including the shocking fatal stabbing of 16-year-old Gabriel Magalhaes in an unprovoked attack at Keele Station. Meanwhile, the Eglinton Crosstown, slated to open in 2020, was pushed back yet again, while Metrolinx CEO Phil Verster still won a contract extension. But on the positive side, Leafs star William Nylander loyally sticks by his ride to every game and there’s finally cell service. And as for not taking the TTC, even Tom Cruise calls out our terrible traffic.
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DID THE FAT LADY FINALLY SING?
People desperate for weight loss — including celebs like Oprah Winfrey — turned this year to semaglutide drugs like Ozempic, which are usually prescribed to Type 2 diabetics but now are being used off-label for obesity.
NOOOOBODY COULD SAVE BAD BOY
After 70 years, the furniture chain built by late former mayor Mel Lastman declares bankruptcy with Mastermind, WeWork and Metroland also running into financial trouble.
CHEF OF DEATH?
Former Toronto hotel chef Kenneth Law made international headlines and he stands charged with 14 counts of second-degree murder involving his alleged sales of sodium nitrate to Ontarians who went on to commit suicide. And it may just be the beginning — police around the world are examining his links to victims in their countries as well.
So let’s bid farewell to 2023, shall we, and here’s wishing you a better 2024.
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